Tomorrow is Molly’s 10th Anniversary

Tomorrow is Molly’s 10th Anniversary

Tomorrow it is ten whole years since I saw her face in front of me.
Since I basked in her radiant smile.
Since I heard her throaty laugh.
Since I felt her warmth and held her close.

Ten years? How can that be?

Ten years crawling and walking this journey of grief.

Ten years of carrying the sadness, the loss and the responsibility of making sure my family would survive.

So ten years on, where am I now?

If someone had told me in those early days that one day I would laugh, still love deeply and live a life of purpose and joy I would not have believed it.

But it's true.

Often the first thing people ask me when they have suffered great loss is, will they ever be happy again?


Ten years later I truly love my life. Through my grief, I have created an authentic life which allows me to do what I love. My life is different now after Molly's passing but it's a life still worth living.

When we withdraw from life and other people, we might think we are emotionally safe, but in truth, we just miss out on living. Going through the motions of life without attachment to love and joy is not what we’re here for. Life, with all its challenges, is full of highs and lows, light and dark, joy and heartache. We’re here to feel it all. That is the privilege of life itself.

Through time I have been more accepting of Molly's death. I am so grateful for all that she has taught both me and others, and I am so proud to be able to share our story to help others.

I can look back and truly appreciate how far my family and I have come. The intensity of the grief and the loss will never be forgotten, but as time has gone, its memory has found a place to live in my heart. 

Ten years on I am still surprised at how little we talk about death and loss. It is still this uncomfortable subject that we try to avoid. I don't consider it an uncomfortable topic anymore and I am always happy when through conversations with me, people feel permission to talk and feel.

Ten years on, my marriage is stronger than ever. Through the many years of carrying each other, we can now walk side by side. Together.

Riley and Emily have bravely walked this journey with us. We talk about Molly all the time and we notice the many ways she makes sure we know she has never left us.

Ten years on I am so proud of my strengths, passions, and talents, and I am much more forgiving of my shortfalls. I feel joy much more often than sadness now. I am more passionate.

Ten years on I know that Molly has never left us. Love is forever and I will continue to love her and the rest of my family and my life …deeply.